I loved this blog post – Letter To My Son – by Aneesah and felt inspired to write to my own son at the time. Trouble was, I had my hands full with him and I had my belly full with another child on the way! Almost every day I think about writing to my sons and my mind overflows with words but I never manage to catch them in writing. So now I have decided to write little and often. To write the lessons I want to pass on to them.
When I have more free time, I plan to write my anecdotes to go with every lesson and share them privately with my kids.
For now though, it’ll have to be little and often Letters To My Children…
Dear Children,
There is nothing wrong with trying to build castles in this world. Just remember: you are building on sand. What you prepare in Jannah will never crumble or wash away.
Dear Children,
At times, you may feel alone on life’s long journey. You have Allah; you don’t need anyone else.
Dear Children,
You were born colour-blind. Work hard at staying that way.
Dear Children,
Throughout your life, others will try to label you. Keep the positives. Tear off the negatives. You define yourself. That’s the only label that matters.
Dear Children,
The world can seem an ugly place at times. But you will always find evidence of love if you look for it. Look for love.
Dear Children,
Life will throw challenges at you – making you believe you’re losing your marbles. Don’t despair. Don’t give up. Do what you would have done in the playground. Win them back.
Dear Children,
Learn to notice your mental health. It’s a spectrum just like your physical health. Notice the dips. Notice them early. The earlier you help yourself, the easier it is to help yourself.
Dear Children,
Your dad and I have been married 9 years today – alhamdulillah. It hasn’t always been easy to hold onto marriage. It took a lot of adjusting, particularly in the middle years. Particularly when I wasn’t practising Islam in the way I do now.
If you find yourself falling out with your other half or anybody for that matter, but your ego is wrestling with you [insert shaitan here], do what we all do: blame something outside of yourself. Blame it on Shaitan.
I can’t tell you how many times your dad and I did this and how many times we couldn’t keep our faces straight once we’d said: “I’m sorry, shaitan made me do it.” And that’s all it took to diffuse the air, to make us laugh or for our hearts to soften.
In time we learnt to reflect on ourselves, admit our faults and say sorry with accountability. But that takes time. If we had waited to tame our egos before mending our relationship we may not have been married long enough to have been blessed with you.
If your ego is getting in the way of apologizing, blame it on Shaitan.
Make amends first.
Work on your demons later.
Love Ammu xx
Dear Children,
When mommy thinks she’s superwoman & takes on more than she needs to, she falls to the ground depleted. In you come with your super-cuteness & fill mommy with so much joy, she can fly again.
You yourselves will soon begin to fly. I hope I am there to watch you soar, to hear you roar. If you get caught up in turbulence or find yourself falling, do what you saw Ammu doing. Find joy, fill up on fuel and climb the skies once more.
Love Ammu xx
Dear Children,
Whether you stand before literal or metaphorical mountains, my advice for you in either scenario is the same:
When you are faced with climbing a mountain, keep your head down and focus on putting one foot in front of the other. Every so often, look back and celebrate the progress you have made.
Love Ammu xx